A Major Setback

No. Not on the diet. That is still one area where I maintain control.

Other parts of life, however, seem to be spinning out of control. Our home has been in escrow for 60 days. The lender for the buyers finally informed us that they just didn't want to lend the money. At least that's the way I interpret it. How on earth in good conscience can they make us (and the buyers) wait this long to decide they just didn't like the thorough and complete appraisal that was performed months ago? After two weeks past the escrow deadline, the lender decides that it needs a second opinion, one from an out-of-town appraiser who does his work from his desk. That's right! He never even laid eyes upon the home or saw the plans (which I have). I realize that every seller thinks their house is unique and different, but there really truly is a difference here. This home was designed by an architecture student of Frank Lloyd Wright, in a very distinctive style of architecture. It is huge and sits on a huge city lot and is made of the very finest materials, not even available today. After all, have you ever seen terrazzo floors in a home? I bet not. This home really had a lot of special architecture and I really think of it more as a fine piece of art. Not only are the materials of construction and the quality superior, but we have thrown major dollars at it, re-doing the roof, electrical, mechanical system and automating and landscaping the 1.25 acre yard. It looks like a park. Now it hurts to even think about how much we have sacrificed to bring this place back to its original splendor.

Oh well, we moved on. I am not sure what we will do with the house. We have wanted out for over 4 years and have done everything in our power to be responsible and ethical, to our own detriment. In today's tough times, it just doesn't make sense to try to do the right thing. I am not going to let my obligation to my children and their future continue to take a second seat to a bad decision that I made years ago (before I chose to be a parent).

So in an effort to bury my head in the sand and continue nesting in my new home, I spent the weekend hanging pictures and things on the walls. I also took at stab at Once A Month Cooking. It's where you cook enough food for the month and then put it all in your freezer. I compare it to doing Thanksgiving dinner every month. It was a lot of work, but I knew this first time around would be especially challenging. Some of the meals are healthy and low-cal, but others are not. I know that with the calorie-packed entrees, I just need to eat smaller portions and match it with some healthy low-cal sides. At least, that's my plan for now. I also managed to make all of the meals, but one, vegetarian. I am so curious to learn how the vegetarian meatloaf ("neatloaf") turned out.

Oh! And I lost another pound, so everything cannot be that bad. When I start to feel sorry for myself, I just hug my girls and remember how fortunate I am to have my family in my life. That alone, is reason to keep going on this journey to being a better person.